Tutorial with Jonathan (07.03.2025)

This time the conversation felt shorter than usual, or maybe it actually was. It was useful nonetheless. It helped me clarify some aspects of the work and highlighted strengths I underestimated.

1.     Experiments with colour

I played around with the “sparkle” images in Photoshop. I don’t think it worked well. As soon as I shift from black to colour, I find the work loses power and mystery. The black background acts like an infinite depth, it contributes to that “cosmic” quality of the works. Moreover, I felt a little uncomfortable using photoshop, a digital tool, to manipulate analogue images. It’s like betraying the process. Materials were not involved, my body was not involved, the senses were not involved. Sterile. It’s cheating without pleasure. I crave the physicality of the darkroom.Jk suggested to maybe go back to this idea later on. I might feel different if I manipulated the colours in the darkroom. Analog, manual, material.

2.     We looked at the Y Ching test:

I set out with this idea of reproducing the 64 hexagrams of Y Ching with incense.  Logistical note: I almost intoxicated myself (too many incense sticks burning at once), so I developed a system with a small fan to keep the burning going so I can step out and take breaks. I tried both glossy and perle paper. They have slightly different effects. I find that glossy is too revealing. Perle has a softer, more balanced quality.In Y Ching you cast coins or sticks to “consult the oracle”, generating whole or broken lines. Six castings compose a hexagram. In this work, I found like a second degree of divination. My intention was to compose hexagram n.1, Ch’ien “the Creative”, which has 6 whole lines. But while burning, some lines broke, composing n. 11, T’ai “the Peace”.

It struck me. Even in a controlled composition, incense manages to surprise me, to bring itself to life, to take its own authorship.

Interesting note…JK sees 6 whole lines. I see broken lines. This difference in perception is fascinating. The white lines are the result of my own manipulation exposing the paper before burning the sticks. JK encouraged me to keep going. Maybe I do all 64 hexagrams. Maybe not. See what happens.

We also looked at some new shapes, more human-made (pyramids, circles). We focused on the pyramid work. That’s a new language. It’s an act of drawing.

The lines become structural forms and you start reading them differently because of that. The simple triangle didn’t work the same way, it kind of flattens out.

The circle feels too pretty to me. Too safe. Lacks violence I think.

3.     We talked about the idea of mixing actual photographs with the combustion technique.

I am exploring the idea of mixing my photographs with these experimental techniques. I’m finding it hard to imagine existing photos for this purpose right now. But I had a vision of body parts ripped apart by burning, and somehow healed at the same time. Actually taking a photo specifically for this might be different.

4.     The Repeated action of the burning.

 JK senses some frustration in me in doing the same thing over and over again. I don’t,  but it’s interesting to hear his perspective. He says the process is gaining some control but there is still always an element of surprise. That’s good, go deeper.

I am exploring different directions within photography and combustion.  

There’s a sense of growing. It may not be fast but it’s constant. I’m discovering the technique layer after layer and I’m starting to use it as a form of expression. Hierophany n.1 is still one of my favourite works. As JK recalled, it’s a gift.

I mentioned the catalogue “on fire” (which I still have to write a post about…), which I found very interesting. It features different artists working with fire.I commented that all artists are men. And the works feel so masculine. I wonder if I can turn it around being a woman. Or if it’s my masculine side’s expression. Not sure.

5.     My first exhibition outside school

Then we briefly talked about the exhibition in Belfast. It was a milestone for me as it consolidated what I’m doing and why. I learnt that sharing the work is a necessary part of the process. I wrote a curatorial statement which clarified my intentions and meanings of the work. And that is proving itself very useful in open calls!

6.     Next steps

I am still torn between following the incense or following combustion. Somehow combustion, the pure act of burning, feels even more profound, more potent. It’s somehow connected to the origin of human society. Prehistoric. It predates incense. I’ve started expanding the materials I burn.

New colours emerge. New textures. We’ll see where this leads.I am quite frustrated about final support. Fine art prints are great, but I loose so much in terms of texture. I’m thinking of exposing both originals and prints.

I need to better understand the relationship with scale. I need large format, but I can’t make analogue prints with the equipment I have access to now.

JK asks WHY the frustration. Is it because on the one hand you feel you are gaining control on the actual darkroom process? Or is it because you don’t have enough control, because there is still so much to learn in this process?

I’m not sure yet. But I tend towards the latter. I feel we’re still discovering each other, the medium and I.

Also, part of the frustration relates to the fact that I haven’t yet found a way to translate what actually happens in the darkroom and convey it to an audience.

JK says that this will always be a challenge, in a process-driven method like mine. “Your experience in the darkroom is incredibly intense, it’s embodied completely in that moment, it is physical. It is so embodied to you in that moment and place, I think it’s basically impossible for me to understand that, as an audience. Unless they’re there with you. But still, when I look at these images, there is something very engaging even simply from a visual point of view. It’s never gonna feel right for you.”

He’s maybe right. But I think it’s still missing a piece. Ritual needs to be passed on. And right now, it’s not.

We discussed about this aspect for the grad show. I can’t burn stuff in the exhibition of corse. Although JK says that if it’s so important to the work, there might be a way to push it, to find a compromise. Incense has a sort of controlled nature to its burning. So maybe we could find a way. If I’m there at all times, maybe…

But reflecting on it, I need some sort of translation, a mediation.

I should  focus on the sensory aspect. We have many senses.

It will always be a compromise from my ritual embodied experience in the darkroom. BUT it will have something to it.

It’s a line that can be crossed. JK thinks I can make it work. So do I.